Raise your hand if you’ve ever felt stuck. Or like you just can’t will yourself to pull out of a slump. You’re trying all the things. And nothing seems to work. Two hands up over here.
Recently, I’ve been dealing with a couple situations in which I felt stuck. I felt like I had pulled down a dead-end road and couldn’t figure out how to even turn around and get back down the street. I knew what I needed to do but wasn’t doing it.
Bob Proctor calls this the Knowing Doing Gap. That's the gap between knowing what to do and actually doing it.
It’s when you know that if you eat that 3rd cupcake, it will not be good for your health or your waistline, but you do it anyway. It's when you know you need to make more sales calls but organize your desk instead. Its' when you know you should turn in your paperwork to get clients billed, but you check your email instead.
Why don't we do what we know we need to do?
It’s called our paradigm. Weird word, but basically, it’s just a collection of our patterns or habits that form how we move about in life. It shapes what we think about ourselves and about others.
If you say, "I ate that cupcake because I have no willpower", it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Because your subconscious mind believes whatever you tell it, you will believe you can’t resist eating the cupcake.
Instead of trying to understand paradigms and why we do what we do, let’s just skip to a basic exercise to change what you’re doing.
Step by step, let’s change your mind, so you can change your behaviors. Grab a piece of paper and a pen, and let's get going.
Step 1. Write about the negative situation that you want to change in your life just how it is now. Write it out in all its gory detail. Don’t hold anything back. Just write.
Step 2. Write about the situation as you would like it to be. Again, just write. Don’t judge whether you believe right now that you can make it happen, write what you want to take place.
Step 3. Highlight or underline all the actions in each of these scenarios, good and bad.
Step 4. Label each of the actions as a Non-Productive Action or a Productive Action. Does it help you achieve what you want or not? It’s that simple.
Step 5. Write out each Non-Productive Action, then write the productive action that could replace it.
Step 6. Use this list of Productive Actions as affirmations that you read aloud daily. Just quickly review out loud every morning with feeling even if you don't quite believe it yet. You are training your brain to form a new belief in this area.
Here’s the thing. You have been thinking in a negative way about this situation for a while. So, it won’t change overnight. But each time you reinforce this new way of thinking, you’ll start forming new neuropathways in your brain towards the new actions, and letting the old ones die.
You’ll be amazed how well this works. I’ve done it over and over with many situations in the past and I’ve changed outcomes for myself instead of staying stuck and you can too.
Let me know how you use this powerful tool and how it works for you. I always love to hear from you.